bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
