We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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