You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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