i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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