Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize