I puked a lego.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
