Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
