So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
