I am in a vortex of obligation.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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