you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize