What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
