i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
