But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
