69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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