just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
You're like the curious george of whores
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
