I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
