dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
