So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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