is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
