I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
