I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
