We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
