Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
