In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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