imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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