So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
