We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
