I wanna bring you to show and tell
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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