i permit you to call me
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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