My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
