Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
