I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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