cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
