So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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