when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
