me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Someone came in the potted fern
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
