I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
They have beer where we have blood.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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