Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize