I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
