oh god the rape fog is back!
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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