Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize