Umm I'm too high to move.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
