office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
