Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
