Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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