yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
