no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
