We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
