3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
