I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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